parenting

Chapter 72: Adam Grant frowns on feeble feminism from fearmongering fellows

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Picture this: You’re a brand new professor two years into a teaching career at an illustrious university and feedback on you as a professor is … terrible. Sorry! But you’re told you suck. By lots of students. Again and again.

How would you process that? Cry? Crawl into a hole somewhere and curl up in the fetal position while sucking your thumb? That’s what I would do! That’s actually what I did do, frankly, in my first job ever at Procter & Gamble. They told me I sucked so I quit and ran away before I got fired.

But Adam Grant? No. He leaned into the feedback. He designed new surveys to get richer feedback. He asked other professors if he could take on more teaching classes. He basically triangulated and solved for the question: what makes a good professor?

Impressive right? Well, he’s been voted the most popular professor for seven straight years so I’d say so.

I had heard this story about Adam before I interviewed him and it made me even more curious about what makes this guy tick.

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He seemingly does everything.

He has a popular podcast with TED called WorkLife which is wonderful if you’re a student of organizational psychology, organizational behavior, or becoming a better leader. 

Oh, and how about his books? Every time Adam Grant pens a new book it shoots straight to the top of The New York Times bestseller list and sort of just roosts there for months. Give and Take, Originals, Option B (with Sheryl Sandberg), and now Think Again which I’ve loved reading.

In Think Again Adam says we must redefine intelligence, not just as the ability to think and learn, but rather embrace rethinking and unlearning. Rejecting the comfort of conviction for the discomfort of doubt allows us to widen our definition of what real intelligence is and widen the aperture of our minds. 

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Adam was good enough to dial me up from Philadelphia where he lives with his wife Allison and his three children. Since I did the interview literally hours after Leslie welcomed our new son into the world, I was a bit brain-jumbled. But we end up having a wonderful chat about parenting and balancing ambition versus contentment, along all the less visible sides of life. We also talk about feminism, humility, work life balance, and of course, Adam’s 3 most formative books.

So 3 Bookers! Stuff the earbuds in and fill up the sudsy sink, grab the leash for a long early-morning walk, or come hang out with Adam and me on a late night driveway chat…

Are you ready to turn the page to Chapter 72?

Let’s go!

What You'll Learn:

  • What are some elements of parenting intentionally?

  • How can busy couples think about sharing work?

  • What is Adam’s view on the state of feminism?

  • What is some low-hanging structural / systemic fruit when it comes to fighting misogyny?

  • What is The Daughter Effect?

  • What are some specific tools Adam uses to help practice humility?

  • What is ‘the curiosity gap’?

  • What does healthy ambition look like?

  • What is the meaning of life? (Yes, really)

Notable quotes from Adam Grant:

“I don’t think we should be sharing our responsibilities equally, I think we should be sharing them equitably.” - Adam Grant #3bookspodcast

“There is something about having a daughter if you’re a man that leads you to worry much more about how the world is going to treat her and what her place is going to be. But I also just got fed up with that effect. You couldn’t care about your wife, or your mom, or your sister, or any other woman you ever met!” - Adam Grant #3bookspodcast

“When we are considering people for jobs and promotions we often just start by evaluating the candidates and it’s too easy to find a reason to not bet on someone who doesn’t look like, or remind you of, someone who has been in that role before.” - Adam Grant #3bookspodcast

“I think humility is a perception that exists in the eye of the beholder.” - Adam Grant #3bookspodcast

“We shouldn’t see confidence and humility at opposite ends of the seesaw, they’re actually most powerful in combination.” - Adam Grant #3bookspodcast

Connect with Adam:

Word of the chapter: 

Resources Mentioned:

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